Mary Guesses Movie Plots

Hello, and welcome to the first installment of Mary Guesses Movie Plots. This is something I do often when a movie is on the threshold of being released, and I only have a title or poster to go off of, so I figured I should write some of these down. You may find I’m inconsistent with the way I guess movie plots. For some, like Miss Peregrine’s, I had a little bit of background knowledge to work with. For others, like Deepwater Horizon, I only had a title to work with and I completely fabricated a plot, going as far as casting my own actors. (I later learned that this is a movie about a horrible oil spill, and not, as I first thought, a gritty drama about cabin people. Welp… you can’t win them all. And you shouldn’t post them all on the internet. And yet you do, as the vague promise of validation hangs in the air…)


In an ironic twist, a dead mechanic, who spent his life resurrecting cars, is resurrected. But he finds that sometimes being given a jump doesn’t always guarantee things will run smoothly!

Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children

These are kids even the orphanage doesn’t want! Miss Peregrine takes in all the fish-scaled, cloven-hooved, eye-patch wearing, telekinesis-having weirdos and makes them delicious soup on a nightly basis. At this home, they learn how to wield their powers. Even if that power is only creepily holding a single red balloon with a dour expression. Get ready for your next bundle of merchandise, Hot Topic!

Deepwater Horizon

Jennifer Lawrence stars in the role of a lifetime as a haggard, mute 78-year-old woman who lives in the wilderness and has learned to make beautiful wood carvings with her teeth. Her life is comprised of hard work and simple pleasures, until a handsome, mysterious stranger (played by Chris Hemsworth) wanders into her neck of the woods and dares to give her the gift of speech. But sometimes the language of love can’t be taught.

The 9th Life of Louis Drax

Louis Drax is a cat on the last leg of his journey on this crazy blue marble. He’s been everything from a pampered Sphynx in Ancient Egypt to a rambling barn cat in Louisiana, and now, as a sedentary Tabby in Brooklyn, he must close the book on all the lives he’s led. But first, there’s amends to make with his estranged daughter-turned-stripped, Angel (a Calico), and his successful ex-wife Smokey (a Persian blue), whose writing career took off while Louis’ hard-won novella met with dismal reviews. It’s not easy being Louis Drax, but on the ninth go-round, maybe there’s a light at the end of the tunnel…


stars Tom Hanks as Sully! In this movie, he has gray hair and his name is Sully. Tom Hanks prepared for this role by dying his hair gray and asking everyone to call him to call him Sully. And it paid off! What a performance!

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